Justin: In the Feast of Being Able to. Amen.

Moving

I got a new place. Just leasing, for now. We’ll see how it feels and go from there in a year. I’ll post more about it very soon! It’s awesome.

60 – 70 hour weeks aren’t as bad as I remembered from college summers. Pretty much no more games, little social life, little anything. Ehh, why not.

Much stress in life, as of late. Little appetite, little sleep. As dad has always said he wants written on his headstone, “This, too, shall pass.” The prayers of friends are priceless.

I’m sanitizing an old post about work, just because I don’t feel comfortable with searches for my company name yielding my blog among the top results. I work with some incredible, hard-working people, and I don’t want my silly work-related stories (though already discreetly obfuscated to protect the innocent) to get any good guys in trouble. Plus, I want to post more stories! What a blessing to find the fun and comedy amidst the routine.

Here’s some sketches:

1. One of our youngest workers, Josh, is in his early 20’s. He’s one of the nicest guys I’ve met in a long time, and if I had the money, I’d buy him a suit and tie just to see it on him in place of his hoodie! Josh is living the care-free life of hanging with friends and crashing on couches after long hours of wii and Playstation. He has a place, but there’s no party there, right? His car is always full of clothes and a plethora of various and sundry vagabond accoutrements. Last week he had a large, clear trash-bag full of cans for recycling in the back seat. He parked near the door, and we all saw it. One of the 3rd shift ladies came in near the end of our night and solemnly asked him, “Josh, are you homeless?” The entire room erupted in laughter, and still afraid he really was, she continued, “You can stay with me, if you want.”

2. A Hispanic co-worker swears he’s black Irish-Mexican.

3. One night, the regional managers – corporate executives – in town from all over the country came in to check out our successful new endeavor. I was told to have a headphone splitter ready for one to listen in on my calls. We shook hands, he sat down behind me and my phone conveniently rang. 30 seconds later, in a rare incident my caller yelled into the phone that I sucked, what good was I, our service was worthless, and it was a waste to have an account with us. It rocked.

4. I get to help train new people. On day 2 or 3, I go off to the conference room and call them directly, giving them test calls. I use different persona’s. My favorite thing to do is say extremely fast, with a Hispanic accent, “This is Hernando Fernando Rodrigrez Jesus Gutierez Pena de Valenzuela. You come highly recommend!” When the trainee is Hispanic and nervously responds to me in Spanish, I say, “Is that Mexican? I’m German.”

5. I’m not the oldest. Yet, for some reason when I call for order among the unruly, Josh always yells “GET OFF MY LAWN!”

6. One co-worker and I live large with a late-night favorite from the kitchen: extra large triple hot chocolate. The supply guy dutifully replaces our box each week.

7. Matt fell hook-line-and-sinker for a voice mail where the man said “Hello? Well hi there! Well, guess what? I’m not in! Leave me a message!” Jordan replays the recording of his “conversation” on speakers throughout the call center at the start of almost every day.

OH, the irate dispatcher who asked what good was I… I defeated him by guilting a Canadian service manager to send his technician 127 miles into the middle of nowhere to help the driver. It was a 15 minute stream of adrenaline working it with the man over my shoulder. I never looked back. When it was over, I turned around and there were 4 of the 10 visitors behind me, along with my immediate boss and our center manager. They clapped.

I used 4 packs in my hot chocolate that night.