Justin: In the Feast of Being Able to. Amen.

Jesus on Belay

from November 9, 2009

Today I recieved my 45th “Final Notice” from EHarmony. Apparently I haven’t logged in since the night Jordan registered me in the hotel room in DAllas on a company trip… 15 months ago. Maybe my criterion was too narrow when I chose “1 block” as the desired distance from my home address.

So I got high with my parents over the weekend. So much paint, so much Kilz. The varnish, the stain. FYI, blackened hardwood floors can look new when properly refinished. So there we are, the 3 of us in a large closet, all painting. I made a comment that we were going to be high, and lo’ and behold my mother whips out the stoner lingo. “We’re taking a trip without leaving the farm!”

I rofl’d in the paint.

So my dad can do anything. Small example: He installed a tankless hot water heater. I took a look at the electrical diagrams and decided I’d stick with spreading Diotamaceous Earth around the house.

Bro. Kent began a study on Ecclesiastes last night. One of my favorite books of the Bible. The thought that everything we do on earth is meaningless, and that nothing we do here is either new or fulfilling… that has always given me great comfort. The thought of anything here mattering beyond loving and serving God would be too much to handle.

“Oh, hi, I’m Jesus. Come on up here, you’re next. Ok, let’s see… ah, yes, Justin. Ok, I see you were employed, and made a decent living… but hmmmm, you know, you were in the bottom 25 percent of the income range, when compared to your peers. And what, pretel, is this? You drove a Ford? Well, you deserve to burn for that, HOWEVER, I am a loving and merciful God, so let’s just keep going.

“Next, it looks like you didn’t rake your leaves very often. Oh, and you mowed every two weeks instead of every week? Hmmm. This is serious.

“Wait… ok, you were a rock climber. However, I see that you only climbed 5.11’s when you were clearly capable of more, had you taken your training seriously.

“So basically, you never won any awards for doing something great, you never saved the planet, you never invented anything, you never had a book published or a hit song…

I’m not really sure you belong here.”

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